You know how some people are able to take whatever life throws at them and always have a positive view of things? I follow a tweeterer who strikes me as being that way- I really enjoy reading her tweets for that very reason. She seems like a wonderful person with a generally positive life view. Do not mistake her positive outlook for naiveté nor foolishness. Other people take whatever life gives them and give up because it’s too hard.
I’m neither of those people. I’m more the “FUCK YOU MOTHER FUCKERS! YOU CAN’T FUCKING KILL ME YOU GOD DAMN SHIT FLINGIN’ BABOON!” Or something to that effect. I’m more of a dark side of the force kinda guy when it comes to dealing with life in general. Life is pain. Life is hard. Bad shit happens to good people. Not because the universe is cruel, not because it’s kind. It just is. I firmly believe that your ability to look life square in the eye and spit in it’s face is a key component to getting along. This doesn’t mean that you to be a prick. Cruelty is the mark of an immature selfish mind. When a tiger kills it is not out of cruelty. It is because that is what tigers do. It is because the tiger must survive. Nothing more.
It is through mastering our passions that we can become free of them. This means that they must be explored. Take sexuality for instance. Why is sex considered taboo? It is a natural process. It is what we do, what we are made for. Sex is in fact our sole purpose in life. The purpose of any species is to continue, to survive. So why should the process of continuation not be perfected? Why should it be hidden? Sex should be celebrated, explored, shared, and perfected. To do anything else would be to deny what we are made to do. As the actual purpose of our existence, sex is more than just procreation. It has deeper meaning. Sex can be recreational, it can be passionate, it can be an expression of love, it can be an expression of hate. But no matter what it must be personally explored. To hide from it is to hide from who and what you actually are. If you exist in a physical body you are a sexual being.
Here I sit down at the horse farm. Listening to the wife talk to her mommy. Watching the four year old play with the dish water. Hello Kitty cartoons playing on the tv. Got laid this morning. Life is good.
Got laid this morning. It was a catastrophe. I completely fucked it up. I didn’t do enough foreplay and then I finished before she did. Terrible and unacceptable. A man’s worth in bed is measured by his ability to please his partner. She deserves better from me. I shall aspire to do better next time. In fact, I always aspire to do better- this time it just didn’t work out. She started running her finger nails up the side of my back and I went off like a loaded gun. Whoops. Can’t win ‘em all I guess.
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